Sudden deafness

On November 19, 2024 I got a cup of coffee and sat on my sofa in the living room. The rain moved in and I felt a strange need to “pop” my ear. So I yawned and I heard a snap. Immediately there was a feeling of swelling. I thought nothing of it until I answered my cell phone. As I placed the phone to my left ear I realized I was completely deaf! I got online and started reading. “Sudden sensory-neural hearing loss” and “Single-sided hearing loss” are the words I saw online. I read the stories and realized I was in a medical emergency.

Basically, I was now deaf in one ear with a roaring sound taking the place of conversation. It sounded like space mixed with television static. It was VERY LOUD and disorienting.

Along with the deafness came vertigo. I had to sit down for a good month. I slept a lot and thought of death. I was very confused, worried and bothered that this new normal would throw me over the edge.

But along with the trial, came a strong dependence on the LORD. I sat with Him, prayed, wept and journaled. I read the Scriptures. Slowly, my brain adjusted. I realized I would be okay. I would never the the same. But I would be okay.

Below is a poem I wrote following my deafness -

In my head my brain looks left

Looking for a sound to test

“Where’s the ear? Where’s the ear?

Why cannot this one hear?”

Swirling brain, unsteady feet

Causes me to take my seat

Sitting with my lovely LORD

I sit and ponder. Praise. Adore.

Oh, His fellowship is grand!

He lovingly takes up my hand.

“You never rest, my busy child,

It’s time to Sabbath for a while.”

He leads me to his precious Word

to show me things I’ve never heard.

My heart is tested. Sins are shown.

Confessions made. Compassion grown.

What the enemy seeks to steal

The LORD renews and starts to heal.

I thought it was a damaged ear

That needed His touch of repair.

Instead it was unbalanced life

A busy one that sought to strive

“Margin” was preached on Sunday morn,

And margin’s been given by my LORD.

So teach me, LORD, to number my days

And fill my mouth with joyful praise

On this GLORIOUS THANKSGIVING DAY!